Fashionable Friday: Let's Go To THE MALL

First of all, if you don't know the song I referenced in the title, then our friendship is over. Unless you watch the first two seasons of How I Met Your Mother in the next 24 hours.

Or, you know, the following video.

Now let's talk about my trip to the mall with everyone's favorite Roomie, Mandi!

My number one destination was, of course, Sephora. Guys, the Jasmine line finally came out! It's real! It wasn't just a fever dream! Jasmine has always been my favorite princess, but it seems to me that she always gets the shaft; Cinderella, Aurora, Snow White, and Belle are the go-tos, and our poor desert flower usually only shows-up when at least six princesses are invited to the party. Not in my house, and not in these hallowed black-and-white halls. I'm really impressed with the collection - they really did my gal proud.

I had a tough time deciding how to spend my Christmas money. Luckily, my favorite Roomie was there to offer her advice. It came down to the compact, the large eyeshadow palette, and the body shimmer.

Beautiful compact to reflect a beautiful Galen?

Gorgeous packaging hiding pretty colors?

Or GLITTER???

I'm a child of the 90s (and a teen of the 00s), so I am particularly susceptible to body glitter. But this stuff took me completely by surprise. Don't let the bottle fool you - there is zero liquid in there. It is pure, dry iridescence.

Unfortunately, Very Excellent Boyfriend hates glitter. So to ensure domestic tranquility, I chose the palette. Right now, it is perched on our bookshelf, bringing a touch of Disney whimsy to the bedroom.

It'll keep the Community whimsy company

I'm sure you already noticed the magic lamp decorating her décolletege (scandalous!), but did you notice Rajah by her feet? Or the Genie? Or what I can only assume is Jafar in snake form?

That's not all I got at Sephora, but I won't bore you with the details. At least, not right now - maybe another time. I'll give you a hint, though: the color emerald is involved.

After my makeup splurge, I didn't intend to spend more money. But Mandi and I stepped into Forever 21, and I momentarily lost control of myself. How could I not?

Y'all, I've only had one run-in with a leather skirt, and it wasn't a very positive experience. But this one and I were fast friends. This is my Dominatrix Catholic Schoolgirl look - let's see if it sticks. 

That's it for this week, folks! March is hitting its stride, and spring is finally rolling into town. Let's all wear our pajamas inside-out tonight and pray for a 70-degree weekend. I'll see you when the flowers are in bloom (and the pollen is a-fallin').

Fashionable Friday: War Paint

Gentlemen and Ladies Who Don't Care For Makeup: THIS IS YOUR WARNING. The following post is devoted to Sephora, a.k.a. Straight Man Hell. Leave this place. 

Do it now.

Are the dudes gone? Good.

LADIES: Sephora just announced their newest Disney line: The Jasmine Collection. I can hardly contain myself - my favorite store featuring pretty things based on my favorite princess? Genius. I am a sucker for pretty things - especially when they have the Disney Princess endorsement. Especially especially when that princess is Jasmine.

She's just the most.

Right now, none of it is available in stores. But if you're a Beauty Insider member, you can order it from the website. I'm going to wait for the line to come out in stores - I want to see it all in person.

The first thing anyone notices about Jasmine are her boobs eyes, so naturally there's a liner set.

(Photo courtesy of Sephora.com)

Once you have the perfect, dramatic cat-eye, it's time to color in the lines. There are two eyeshadow palettes in the collection - the deluxe Storylook...

If the tray comes out and the rest is a keepsake box, I will faint.
(Photo courtesy of Sephora.com)

...and the more modest Magic Carpet Ride:

(Photo courtesy of Sephora.com)

I've gotta say - for the money, Storylook seems like a much better deal. But either way, the colors are based on the movie's animation, which makes me want to weep.

(Photo courtesy of Sephora.com)

If you're a nail polish junkie, then this is your poison:

(Photo courtesy of Sephora.com)

I'm still recovering from getting the entire Muppets OPI collection, so I'll probably pass on the lacquers. But I love the light blue (excuse me, "Blue Oasis").

I don't feel like royalty unless I smell like it, so fragrance is very important to me. Of course, there's a perfume to complete the Eastern ambiance. And don't worry - it is not jasmine scented (whew!). I don't do floral perfumes; they make me feel like I'm allergic to myself. It does seem to have some floral topnotes (carnation, orange blossom), but it's over a base of vanilla and sandalwood, so there's hope.

(Photo courtesy of Sephora.com)

Or, if you are a diva and love beautiful things, you can get the perfumed body shimmer, which has the same scent, but will make you sparkle like the beautiful desert diamond you truly are. Also, it comes in a gorgeous old-fashioned bottle with one of those air puff things that Greta Garbo totally used. I just know she did.

(Photo courtesy of Sephora.com)

Very Excellent Boyfriend is pathologically afraid of glitter, but I really don't care. He can suck it up while I swirl around like a diamond in the rough.

When you're all dolled-up and ready to go (or whenever you feel like checking-in with your favorite lady), you can take a gander at yourself with the Palace Jewel Compact Mirror:

(Photo courtesy of Sephora.com)

Uugh, so beautiful. It hurts.

Sorry if this all sounded a bit like bad copywriting - when I get excited, I tend to wax corny descriptive.

I'm a poor kid, so I don't know if I'll be able to splurge on any of this stuff, but I will definitely go to the store and play around with it all, and when I do there will be pictures and words about the experience. Actually, I have a coupon for a free 45-minute makeover - maybe I'll get Jasmified by a professional!

I'd better get on that, actually - Aladdin is going to Broadway, and this little white girl wants in.